A blog about hope, despite the disabilities.
Sarah had to write a personal narrative at school. She’s in 5th grade and came home to tell me she had written about what happened the day Catherine died. The below is published with her permission and all my love. “Give CPR!” I heard my mom yell at 5:25 in the morning. The first thought…
My doctor friend arrived shortly thereafter. Seeing her interrupted my thoughts and pleas to God that THIS was not supposed to be the way our story ended. I saw her walking down the hall and recall thinking “Wow, she got dressed nice!” I guess I expected a “roll out of bed and hop in the…
In the ambulance, I kept kicking myself. Why didn’t I print her medical history last night? I was lazy. Serves me right. I had updated it. All the info was there – just for emergencies like this. But I didn’t feel like printing it, and I honestly didn’t think we’d have an emergency so close…
So many people asked me, “What happened?” in the hours after Catherine died. I repeated the story over and over again – to paramedics… to doctors… to nurses… to clergy… to family… to friends… I finally got tired of it and told them I couldn’t answer that question any more. Numbness took over. Everyone describes…
Two weeks ago, today, I was up at 5:00 AM preparing for my day like usual. Well, not exactly like usual because it’s a Wednesday, and I usually wash my hair on Wednesdays. Two weeks ago, today, I was dragging. The alarm went off and I had to work hard not to hit the snooze…
It’s always interesting how sitting in the hospital makes me want to write. Catherine has pneumonia and we just learned she also has a bowel obstruction. That’s something that wasn’t on my radar! Her belly has been so distended for such a while that it’s become our normal. Lots of questions – from me, from…
Psychologists will tell you, according to Darren Hardy in his best seller, The Compound Effect, “Nothing creates more stress than when our actions and behaviors aren’t congruent with our values.” I think I disagree. I lead a business book group and we just read this book because it had dramatically altered the life of a…
There are quite a few things Catherine can’t do. She can’t walk. She can’t talk. She can’t see. She can’t move very much. These are facts and her reality. For most of us, the things we think and say we can’t do are actually choices. Think about it. Sarah might say, “I can’t do my…
I’m tired of training nurses. Perhaps I should view each new nurse as an opportunity for improvement. I do. I find that the perspective shift doesn’t remove the reality that I’m simply tired of it. Every time a new nurse starts, we wonder if she’s going to do a good job. And every time a…