Looks like the prayers are working – ugh. Catherine had a bigger “tremor” last night and they told Brian today that it looked like a seizure. They told him we would probably start a new medication tomorrow. Just now, she had a 25-minute “tremor” and it was so hard to watch! Usually we hold her so I don’t usually see her little face. I’ve only ever heard about people saying “their eyes rolled back in their head” and tonight I saw it. It was my little girl.
As I watched – significantly aware there were people in a control room watching her and me, I remembered back to a presentation I made at Christ Church in Charlotte. It was the same presentation I made to my home church in Severna Park. In Charlotte someone asked me “What makes you angry?” I replied quickly that I didn’t really feel anger. I went on to take the next question and stopped mid-answer and said out of the blue – “Seizures. Seizures make me angry.” They did again tonight. I hate them and they scare me and I wonder what is happening in her experience of it. Does it hurt? Does she want to be held? Can she hear me? And feel me holding her hand? Is anything I do making any of it any better?
Maybe someone here can answer those questions for me. For now, she sleeps like she hasn’t a worry in the world.
That’s right, Catherine. Give Mommy all those worries and you sleep in peace, little bug. I love you.
Thank you for sharing Ellen. We are all carrying the pain for you so you. Keep doing the best thing you can do and love her with everything you have. Tomorrow is going to be a really good day. Lots of love.
It is so good to hear that tomorrow will be a really good day cuz that’s today 🙂 thanks Susie!