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Prayers Are Working – I Guess

December 4, 2013 by Ellen Moore Leave a Comment

Looks like the prayers are working – ugh. Catherine had a bigger “tremor” last night and they told Brian today that it looked like a seizure. They told him we would probably start a new medication tomorrow. Just now, she had a 25-minute “tremor” and it was so hard to watch! Usually we hold her so I don’t usually see her little face. I’ve only ever heard about people saying “their eyes rolled back in their head” and tonight I saw it. It was my little girl.

As I watched – significantly aware there were people in a control room watching her and me, I remembered back to a presentation I made at Christ Church in Charlotte. It was the same presentation I made to my home church in Severna Park. In Charlotte someone asked me “What makes you angry?” I replied quickly that I didn’t really feel anger. I went on to take the next question and stopped mid-answer and said out of the blue – “Seizures. Seizures make me angry.” They did again tonight. I hate them and they scare me and I wonder what is happening in her experience of it. Does it hurt? Does she want to be held? Can she hear me? And feel me holding her hand? Is anything I do making any of it any better?

Maybe someone here can answer those questions for me. For now, she sleeps like she hasn’t a worry in the world.

That’s right, Catherine. Give Mommy all those worries and you sleep in peace, little bug. I love you.

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Filed Under: Doubt Tagged With: disability, Epilepsy, Hopkins, kids, seizures

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Comments

  1. Susie says

    December 4, 2013 at 2:22 am

    Thank you for sharing Ellen. We are all carrying the pain for you so you. Keep doing the best thing you can do and love her with everything you have. Tomorrow is going to be a really good day. Lots of love.

    Reply
    • Ellen Moore says

      December 4, 2013 at 3:29 pm

      It is so good to hear that tomorrow will be a really good day cuz that’s today 🙂 thanks Susie!

      Reply

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Hi, I’m Ellen

I’m just a mom making my way, but my way is a little different. And yet, very much the same. I have a 13-year-old daughter, Catherine, who was born at 25 weeks and weighed one pound, nine ounces. Despite a very severe brain bleed, she lived and inspires me every day with all she works so hard to do... Read More…

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