Waiting Again…

It’s always interesting how sitting in the hospital makes me want to write. Catherine has pneumonia and we just learned she also has a bowel obstruction. That’s something that wasn’t on my radar!

Her belly has been so distended for such a while that it’s become our normal. Lots of questions – from me, from nurses, from doctors as we arrived in the ER. I think the paramedics may have even asked about it when they arrived Thursday afternoon after I realized she needed to go to the H. “Is her belly always that large?” they would ask. And we would simply say, “Yeah” and move forward.

It’s been bugging me that it was large. We even had her pediatrician check it over time and it’s seemed fine. There are so many directions I could take with this post from this point. Guilt. Disagreement. Hope. Intuition. Frustration. Gratitude. Always gratitude.

I’m grateful we sit in the middle of one of the top hospitals in the world! And I’m grateful for the care Catherine’s getting. I’m grateful for the custodial staff who make sure her room is clean as they minimize the transfer of germs. I’m also grateful for the night I slept longer than I have sleep probably in 13 years! How likely is that in the ICU at Johns Hopkins? And I’m grateful for “my friend” who is making this a little easier to manage. And for so many other friends who lift us up in prayers and white light.

Regardless of what is happening, I purposefully seek gratitude. How can you stay in a funk (and yes! I was in one yesterday!!) when you sit back and think of something – any little thing – that can elicit gratitude?

Like now – nothing is beeping. Not one thing on this whole ICU. I love when God stills the place like that. It’s so rare. And so wonderful. And it’s lasted as long as I’m typing this on my phone. Aaaah. I’m grateful.